At this time of year the veil between worlds thins and we start thinking about honoring our ancestors and loved ones who have passed on at Samhain. For me it will always be especially bittersweet as it's also the time of year that my previous husband died from chemo just two days before his 53rd birthday. I did a very private ritual that year saying goodbye to him.
The year that I turned 53 I went from feeling old because I was in my 50s to realizing just how young I still am because I had just outlived him and so many others that I know who have died way too young of chemo (note that I never say they died of cancer, I'll be doing blog posts and videos about that subject another day).
This year it's again a bittersweet time for me because my current husband and I are preparing this house to sell in the spring. I have so many memories here as my late husband was living here with his father when we met and married, then he inherited it and then I did all within a very short span of time. Gene and I only had a total of two years and eight months together from the moment we started dating until the day he died.
My best friend and I hung out here every Saturday night and she helped me to decorate it. Then Steve and I started dating here, he moved in, we married and this house became ours. I've lived here longer than in any other house, even those I lived in with my parents. I made this house my own after I inherited it, truly making it over to fit my personality and to become my healing refuge--which then became a healing space for so many others.
I have so many good memories here. It's not easy to leave it, but I want to return to my home state to live out my remaining years and if there's one thing I've learned, it's that life is too short and we need to live it fully and follow our dreams.